This past week, following a bout of back-to-school illness in our house, and recovery that took more than a couple of days, I’ve been talking to my Sacred & Sexy Creative Community about what self care means to them.
As women, we often have a focus on others and not ourselves. We put others’ needs before our own and we prioritise everyone else’s schedule ahead of our ours. We were potentially taught to do this from a young age. We are usually the primary care-givers and are the ones holding the household together.
Not for one minute am I saying we should refuse to do all or any of the above. Family life could potentially fall apart if we were heading out for massages, mani/pedi’s and reiki every night during the dinner hour. But what I am saying is that I believe that if you have a happy, relaxed, focused woman – you have a happy household.
I enjoy picking my daughter from school, and being able to attend little events and milestones. That’s one of the perks of working for yourself. But working for yourself (and others) can come at a price. You can work into the night, you may invest all of your money into your business and be totally skint, and you are often so tired, you end up saying no to everything you used to enjoy! I have been all of the above!
So, I’ve been on a quest to find out what Self-Care means to creative entrepreneurs from all industries and from all over the world. Here’s what they said was most important to them…
1. “Making myself say no when I don’t want to do something is one way I have learned to look after myself. I spent years saying a half hearted “yes” and then carrying around resentment and feeling exhausted. It’s hard to do as I like to think of myself as a helpful person and will go to great lengths not to upset anyone, but I’ve learned that if I don’t care for myself I have less to give to others”. Jackie Marsden, Sexual Health Nurse / Trainer & Writer, UK
2. “I exercise – I do yoga..swim and powerplate mixed with cardio and leg weights”. Nickie Theobald, Model & Make-Up Artist, Ibiza
3. “I have 6 sacred disciplines, but I’ll share this one: connect with a warm body each day. Big, heartfelt hug and soul connection with your kin. Share your energy!” Kate Berquist, Health Coach, USA
4. “Walking is my biggest self care tip. I walk 2 hours a day and have discovered so many benefits”. Karen Hodgson, Spiritual Promoter of Spiritual Technology, Ideas and Tools, Australia
5. “Just meditation”. Nikki Nightowler, Teaching Assistant, UK
6. “Yoga, meditation and a clean vegan diet”. Flavia Bernardes, Illustrator, Ireland
7. “No rules — that is one of my biggest self care things. No rules to beat myself up with. Also managing money in a way that keeps me feeling safe. Plus nourishing food”. Leila Hussain, Writer & Poet, UK
8. “My first self care tip is to have my access bars run (a technique for energy work focused on the scalp) to create space and ease in my life. Dancing one song a day keeps the mind away and yoga every day”.
Marizete Da Silva, Consciousness Facilitator, Yoga Teacher & Journalist, USA
9. “Talking to myself nicely, like I would talk to a friend”. Heidi Pryce, Veterinary Nurse, UK
10. “Self recognition in the mirror. I use affirmations which are appropriate for whatever aspect of myself I am working on at that time. E.g self-belief when going self employed
‘I am good enough to have my own business. I have extensive knowledge and valuable skills, which will benefit others worldwide”. Helen Courteney – Award Winning Author, Self Realisation Mentor, UK
11. “Simply bath and bed”. Fay Johnstone, Reiki Master, Holistic Therapist & Meditation Teacher, Scotland
12. “Congratulating myself on a good job instead of criticising myself for not doing a good enough job, and smiling”. Annie Rose, Sexual Health Nurse, UK
13. “Hmmmm I have more than 1 in equal place so take which suits you! Yoga, Gratitude journal, Meditation, Juices”. Stacey Bout, Holistic Kinesiologist, Australia
14. “When I go to bed and get up I recall 5 things that I’m grateful for and try and stay in the attitude of gratitude”. Liz Hoar, Reiki Practitioner, UK
15. “Stop giving others second chances. it saves my sanity”. Sarah Steele, Executive Coach & Speaker, USA
16. “Exercise. It energizes my body and mind. I love Zumba, but yoga, walking, or whatever suits you is great”. Sarah Schwab, Content Creation Coach, USA
17. “Sleep or just the permission to lay in bed”. Corrin Elizabeth Knight, Spiritual Healer, USA
18. “Buy yourself a bunch of flowers”. Claire Foal, Blogger, Australia
19. “Listen to motivating Cd’s so that no one can destroy me by harsh words. I am good enough after all”. Carol Wright, Entrepreneur, UK
20. “Having boundaries and not allowing others to compromise them. Plus meditation and a super awesome bubble bath with a good book and scrumptious beverage once in awhile”. Shari Mallinson, Artist, Canada
21. “Doing less and delegate tasks in order to create white space for myself. Having the courage to take breaks, laugh, have fun and give time to the things I really enjoy. Be honest with myself…..these are some of the things I’ve been doing that have made miracles for me lately”. Adina Camelia, Aspiring Coach, Romania
22. “Honouring myself in the morning…setting the stage for my day with daily rituals..meditation, body movement, morning pages, nourishing breakfast and hot water with lemon”. Dana Pettit Canneto, Body Awakening Catalyst for Women, USA
23. “I have two young children and the way I start my day before the chaos begins is to make a glass of water with lemon and honey. It cleansing and hydrating, and a ritual for self care before I take care of others”. Stacie Jacin, Landscape & Garden Designer, USA
24. “Happiness is family when they are happy it makes me happy”. Romana Richards, Lecturer, Trinidad and Tobago
25. “Treating every day as a special occasion – i.e. treating yourself well”. Charlotte Pingriff, Artist & Author, UK
I LOVE this list! The great thing about the majority of the above is that most of it is FREE. It is stuff we can just implement in to our everyday lives.
OK, so mine is as follows: Hot water and lemon as I awake, laying in bed snuggling in the morning with my little girl, eating really well 90% of the time, and going for a few runs a week…Catching a few movies, planning exciting trips away.
- An important thing – and us mums shouldn’t forget this – is to ask for help. Your wellbeing is critical not only to your business but to your family life as well. Ask for help so occasionally you can free up some time to do stuff you love or to just do nothing.
- Learn a technique that helps you slow down and be a little still. There is magic in stillness.
- Take up something that has interested you for a while, whether it’s a year long course that you’ve been thinking about taking or a crochet or fitness class on a Tuesday night.
Finally, if you already are doing too much, remember it’s OK to say NO too!
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Have a big, beautiful week..