The pleasure and the pain….

The pleasure and pain of life…

So, last week it was my dad’s birthday and on the day of his birthday, we went to listen to him deliver a moving and touching speech to a few hundred people at a packed out church in Bedford, UK.

It was World Remembrance Day for Road Traffic Victims, of which my beloved 19 year old brother was one of them… He died suddenly on Halloween 1998, when the car he was a passenger in hit a tree at high speed on a rainy night.

The sudden death of a family member brings dark times. It’s hard to see or feel the light for a while. But slowly, the sensations of pleasure come back into your life… At first they are unwanted sensations, the guilt pings us back into the pain. The pain becomes comfortable…Eventually the pleasure brings new waves of euphoria and the realisation that life cannot be stopped. It is a force.

One such ‘light’ for our family was the Road Victims Trust. They are a charity who provide counselling and support to those left behind following the death of a loved one. Often people are so consumed with their own grief that they can’t look into each others eyes or feel each others hearts, or hear each others voices. So, to have a service, like this, that is free, and is there for you and your needs – is literally a God-send!

During the service, my heart was with those families left behind in the Paris massacres. A mindless, violent act that can’t be taken back. I really hope those families get the support they need to move on with their lives eventually.

Life is a dance of pleasure and pain… I’ve worked in the self development industry for many years and there’s an ideology that we’re looking for a perfectly happy, pain free existence… I don’t actually think it can exist… At least not right now…

Pain is an indicator… a yard stick that we can move. It shows us where we are at and that we need to work through stuff to push through to the other side… Pain can be found in family and friends, accidents and mindless behaviour…attempting to forgive and learning to understand others..

Pleasure is desire, love, open-ness, connection, soul-stirring conversations. It’s the flashes of inspiration, the warmth of an embrace and laughter of your little ones… It’s the happiness found in family and friends, forgiveness, true empathy and more love…

It’s all energy and it’s there for a reason… To bring us back to the into alignment, bind us and make us whole and present… It’s not meant to be perfect, it’s meant to be real.

Have a beautiful one…

Kerrie xox

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